Happiest Toddler Parent Success Stories

Happiest Toddler on the Block
January 4, 2012 by California
I have that book and have liked it; thanks for reminding me that it’s on the shelf!
We’ve had a number of grade-A, high-intensity tantrums lately Tried the technique the other night and…miracle! HC wound down in a hurry compared to me leaving her alone in the room to continue to pitch her fit, so I think this is what we’ll try (hers are worst at bedtime usually) from here on out. Plus I like the idea that it teaches her that just because she’s upset and acting out, she’s still loved and attended to in a supportive way. HTH and good luck; the 3s are torture in so many ways!! But it does make the good days seem that much sweeter!

Love Dr. Harvey Karp,
November 10, 2011 by Sterling Elizabeth
I love Dr Harvey Karp. He explains things so simply, and IT JUST MAKES SENSE!!! I look forward to buying the DVD so I can see him in action!!!!! A must read for all parents. {Thank you so much for your intelligence Dr. Harvey Karp!!

Helps me understand my lil one,
September 30, 2011 by RVK’s mom
I have a 11 month old, so havent put any of the ideas in the book into working. But from what I have read, this book makes me understand my lil one as to why he does certain things. This book is interesting to read and has a positive approach. I was able to relate to whatever is in the book, as my lil has started exhibiting a few of them. Must read.

Review on Karp’s Toddler book,
October 9, 2011 by Sundaymorning
Our daughter is 5 mos old right now. I read his baby book -his tips work like a charm. I’d be a fool to not use the tips in this book. Additionally, they have a website and a live person who answers the phone for any specific questions. I am excited
to see our daughter hit the ‘caveman’ stage :)

A must-read…even before your baby becomes a toddler.,
June 8, 2011 by A&J
I first checked this out from my local library and knew I HAD to own my own copy because I would be referring to it for years to come. Really enjoyed Karp’s “The Happiest Baby on the Block” book and video so knew this toddler edition would be worth the read. I read it before my son turned one and kept finding myself wanting to highlight/underline/write in the margins; that’s when I know a book is a keeper. My son is only 14 months old, but I’ve already tried some of Karp’s tips and suggestions for this age of toddler and it’s been successful so far. Whenever I notice other parents at the park or the grocery story totally losing it w/ their toddler and saying inappropriate things, I wish the could know about about this book.

Read this Book,
March 31, 2011 by Tiffany Campbell
If you have not read the first book, go and get that one as well as the video. This book continues into the toddler years giving parents tools to communicating with their little cavechild to stop the temper tantrums and erratic behavior. I know it seems unbelievable but it really works and keeps mom and dad sane while making a happy toddler.

I love the book
March 7, 2011, by JRonk on community.babycenter.com
I love the book. The concepts are more difficult to grasp than the Happiest Baby book because the baby concepts were all physical whereas the toddler concepts are all vocal and communication. If nothing else it reminds us that our toddlers are more like uncivilized little cave people instead of mini-adults that many mistakenly assume. They do no think the same as we do so as adults we need to take that into consideration when communicting with them. Karp’s techniques seem silly at first but if you stop and think about it the FFR and toddlerese (speaking so your audience understands) are good communication techniques for anyone regardless of age. Lenghty explanations just get lost on a toddler audience and begins to sound like the “whah-whah” of a Charlie Brown Teacher. We all should mimic other’s emotions so that they understand that we get what they are saying. I’ve got a pretty easy going kid but the few tantrums that we have had have been quickly ended or stopped all together because of how I handle communication between us. I like that Karp describes the world from a toddler perspective. They are smaller, less knowledgeable, and weaker than everyone around them. They need to have little “wins” everyday to feel ownership over thier little lives. If we can give them these wins, they are more cooperative with us on the big things.

Excellent!!!! Brilliant!!!
November 8, 2010 by Tamie
This review is from: The Happiest Toddler on the Bl (DVD) Excellent book. Very helpful. To get anything out of it, you will have to commit to using the methods, not just reading about them. Read a chapter, practice, read the next chapter, practice some more. I’ve read through the book several times, and will probably continue to go back to it until my son is 4 (now 2.) They are easy methods. They work like crazy. But, I have been exposed to violence and yelling my whole life and have to re-program my automatic behavior. (My kid will not have this problem! That is a real miracle.) Eventually, the effective stuff becomes your new automatic reaction/behavior (with consistent practice/repetition.) It’s like parenting “kung-fu” … parent-fu?… without the hitting.
I also *strongly* suggest every new parent read the author’s other book: Happiest Baby on the Block. It’s fantastic – not just for the child, but will allow you to keep your sanity & health, etc. It will make you a happier parent.
The 2 books would make a perfect baby shower gift for anyone.

If you buy one book, this is the one
March 19, 2009, By T. Doucette (Littleton, Massachusetts)
In addition to some ground-breaking techniques this book is a thorough overview of the mind of a toddler and covers so many common problems. Read it, then read it again. Keep it by the bed side, every time you pick it up you get a good idea.

Great book if you have an ‘active’ child
August 30, 2008, By M. Nemeth (Ashford, CT USA)
I have a very active child who won’t listen to “no”. This book helped me realize what is going on in my developing child and made me rethink everything. It is a great read and by putting new practices to use, I notice my child listening and acting better already! Best book I have read yet!

It Works!!
February 15, 2008, By A Strong Poet (Evanston, IL United States)
Yes, speaking toddler-ese to our one year old son works to calm tantrums. It worked the first time I tried it and then didn’t seem to be working, so I quit because it’s kind of embarrassing to do, especially in front of other adults. I started again, at home, because I had to do something. Gradually, it started to work more and more. I am now a convert. He quiets down now much faster. He looks me in the eye and looks at me like I understand. I am so happy!! Thank you Dr. Karp.

Best Advice for parents of toddlers
November 24, 2007, By annabelle (colorado)
Well written, very informative. Dr. Karp not only gives the best advice I have ever received for parenting my toddler, he also teaches you why his advice works. Coming from a mom THIS WORKS!

Works like a charm
May 28, 2007, By Rainy (Seattle)
We are two working parents, so patience and time are frequently limited. I much prefer to use words that expand her vocabulary, not baby words. So, imagine my surprise when I heard that part of the technique was using simple words and phrases, repetition and matching the emotions of the child. Despite the positive praises in the DVD, I was still skeptical.
As I was watching the video, my husband was bringing my two year old toddler up the stairs to bed. She was wailing and he was using his best firm voice. I rushed in the room and used the technique. This child stopped and looked at me like I was a crazy person. She then ran over to me and gave me a hug. I then told her that it was time to go to bed and asked her to help me take off her shoes. Battle #1 over.
As is the norm in our house, the toddler gets in the crib and bounces, sings and calls out to us for 30 – 60 minutes EVERY Night. So, I go into the room and using the technique (even though this is not a true tantrum). After I ackn her desire not to go to sleep, I tell her that it is night-night time and ask for a hug before she goes to sleep. She gives me a hug, grabs her blanket and places her head on the pillow. I rushed to my computer to share the joy. She’s not even singing herself to sleep.
Despite the silly feeling of matching your child’s emotions and simplified language, it really seems to work because the child realizes that you understand what they are feeling. Geez, this is the same stuff they teach in all communication (interpersonal skills) classes.
Give it a try. It’s worth every penny. Oh, I bought the video instead of the book, because I wanted to see the techniques in action. I may pick up a used copy of the book to remind me of the techniques. There are a few and since we have a couple of additional years to survive, it’s nice to have an easy reference.

Finally, Some Answers!
February 24, 2006, By P. Sirtori (Hyattsville, MD)
This book is the answer to any parent trying to cope with an unruly toddler. After a few hours of using the communication tools explained, I noticed a huge difference in my son. After a week he went from having a tantrum everyday to none at all. We now have a whole new respect for eachother and because of this I have a happier toddler and less headaches.

Wow! This worked better than I expected.
January 31, 2005, By C. Kimura “black and yellow fan” (Honolulu, HI)
I was very skeptical when I learned about this DVD. I didn’t think that something could help eliminate 90% of the tantrums that we had with our 2 year old. To my amazement, after my wife viewed the DVD while I was at work. I came home and watched her use it on my son, and it worked. We’ve watched the DVD together since then and have worked on using the techniques to suit our needs. I don’t typically rate products, but I felt compelled to help others who have struggled finding a solution with their toddlers too.

Advice for tantrums that really works
November 29, 2004, By beaky’s mom
I tried all kinds of things but speaking in “toddler-ese” was the only thing that worked to calm down my 2 year old in the middle of a raging tantrum. Dr. Karp’s “fast food rule” is a parenting gem – any child would respond to validation/confirmation of his feelings – when you repeat back what he’s just said he knows he’s being heard. Then he is open to hearing your message. This method works – when I first acknowledge what my toddler feels or wants as Dr. Karp suggests, I am able to get him to do what I need him to do instead. It’s amazing how effective this technique is in dealing with tantrums or better yet, avoiding them altogether.

It really works!!
September 17, 2004, By C. Clark (Midlothian, Texas United States)
I am a mother of a 25 month old. Many of my friends who were also parents of toddlers recommended this book. At first, I was very skeptical. I read through it and tried the Toddler-ese and the Fast Food Rule. It worked immediately!!! In fact today, my husband, my daughter and I were at a restaurant. She started to get upset because she wanted me to hold her. My husband talked to her in Toddler-ese and immedatiately she stopped crying! I am very impressed with this book and will recommend it to others!

A wonderful way to communicate love and respect!
September 14, 2004, By Michele “eternitygirl” (Downers Grove, IL)
After reading Dr. Harvey Karp’s book, “The Happiest Baby on the Block,” and watching that DVD – and having great success using his methods with our newborn – I was anxious to read and watch this follow-up volume. I read the book, “The Happiest Toddler on the Block,” first, which I recommend, to get the nitty-gritty on his methods and to understand the “whys” behind his methods. It takes awhile to get through the book and have it well absorbed, but it is certainly time well spent since it will save you from three or more years of headaches!
I was so impressed by the book that I decided to buy this DVD in order to see real-life examples of his methods. I was not disappointed. This DVD offers a great overview/review of the book, real-life examples with parents and toddlers, and thoroughly covers the main points (such as “Toddler-ese” and “The Fast Food Rule”) as well as most of the side topics (such as “Feeding the Meter” and “Gossiping”). Again, it is time and money well spent since it will help save you from headaches and public embarrassment! And more importantly, you will begin to form a foundation of open communication and mutual trust with your child as you learn to communicate love and respect to him – in his own language – instead of resorting to more violent or forceful forms of parenting. I only wish that Amazon.com would bundle “The Happiest Toddler” book with “The Happiest Toddler” DVD, instead of bundling Dr. Karp’s two books together and his two DVDs together. I agree with the other reviewers that you really should read the book, too, to get the most out of what he is teaching here. But everything by Dr. Karp is wonderful, easy-to-understand, highly effective, and trustworthy. His methods are not gimmicky; he really understands kids and you’ll understand yours better after learning this material. My daughter is about to turn one and I already connect with her better by using Toddler-ese!
What else would you expect from a friendly pediatrician who always (and I mean ALWAYS) wears blue shirts?!? :)

No more dreading temper tantrums
May 10, 2004, By Tamar Meer (MI)
My 22 month old grandson began to scream when I told him it was time to go inside. I spoke “toddlerese” with much expression as suggested by Dr. Karp.
I said, ” No No No” you do not want to go inside.
He looked at me very surprised.
I said, “No No No” you do not want to go inside.
He looked at me again with his mouth wide open.
I said again, “No No No you do not want to go inside, but we must take sister to potty.”
——— he came with me without protest. In the past he would have continued screaming for about 5 minutes and
I would have picked him up kicking and screaming.
Now I can’t wait to read the book The Happiest Toddler on the Block to get more helpful suggestions for the children in my family and in my practice.
Phyllis Meer, RN, BSN,CPNP and proud grandmother of 4.

Fabulous Parenting Advice
April 25, 2004, By Miriam Bookey (Santa Monica, CA USA)
This DVD is not only informative, it’s entertaining as well. The message (using “toddlerese” to connect with your child) was consistently relayed, cohesive and universally appealing. We watched real parents dealing with VERY real kids in the kinds of situations we all experience (fighting over toys, going to bed, etc etc). Frankly, I think this DVD should be packaged with Dr. Karp’s book “Happiest Toddler on the Block,” as it’s imperative to watch and know exactly how to use the method (and to do it without feeling as if you’re “teasing” or speaking down to your child). My husband and I have both watched it and are following Dr. Karp’s method. Are we happy? You bet. Our 2-year-old’s tantrums have gone down at least 75% (both frequency and duration).
ETA: One year later, our son is now two and I recently tried speaking toddler-ese and the fast food rule again. Just repeating back to him what he is upset about in short, simple phrases. Still works!!

Really helpful child-rearing book
December 14, 2005 by Dahlia Lithwick, senior editor and legal writer for Slate.com and NPR
As the perennially weary mother of a 2-year-old and a 7-month-old, I also offer this somewhat embarrassing submission for a really helpful child-rearing book, suggested in turn (and with some embarrassment) by our pediatrician but truly full of tremendous insight: The Happiest Toddler on the Block

This DVD is informative and fun!
Miriam (Santa Monica, CA USA)
This DVD is informative and fun! It shows real parents dealing with VERY real kids in situations we all face (fighting over toys, going to bed, etc etc). We found it is imperative to watch exactly how to do the methods (so you can do it without feeling like you’re “teasing” or speaking down to your child). Are we happy? You bet. Our 2-year-old’s tantrums have gone down at least 75%.

After my wife viewed the DVD I watched her use it on my son, and it worked!
Mr. Kimura , Honolulu, HI
I was very skeptical. I didn’t think that anything could eliminate 90% of our 2-year-old’s tantrums. To my amazement, after my wife viewed the DVD I watched her use it on my son, and it worked! We’ve watched the DVD together since then use the techniques as needed. I don’t typically rate products, but I felt compelled to help others struggling to find a solution with their toddlers.

He quiets down now much faster.
A Smiling Mom, Evanston, IL
Speaking “toddler-ese” to our one year old son works to calm tantrums. It worked the first time I tried it but, I quit because it’s kind of embarrassing to do. Then, I started again, at home, because I had to do something. Now, he quiets down now much faster. He looks me in the eye and looks at me like I understand. I am so happy!!

Finally, Some Answers!
November 24, 2007, By annabelle (colorado)
Well written, very informative. Dr. Karp not only gives the best advice I have ever received for parenting my toddler, he also teaches you why his advice works. Coming from a mom THIS WORKS! Finally, Some Answers!

This book is the answer to any parent trying to cope with an unruly toddler.
February 24, 2006, By P. Sirtori (Hyattsville, MD)
This book is the answer to any parent trying to cope with an unruly toddler. After a few hours of using the communication tools explained, I noticed a huge difference in my son. After a week he went from having a tantrum everyday to none at all. We now have a whole new respect for eachother and because of this I have a happier toddler and less headaches.

The best DVD of the decade.
April 29, 2004 by a Customer
The more you watch it the more sense it makes. We have three boys ages 3, 3, and 6. As you begin to put the techniques into practice you observe the change in your child almost right away. At first it feels odd but with practice all these techniques become second nature. The gossiping works like a charm on kids almost any age. The todler-eze helps toddlers as well as older kids to come out of the impasse and save face. Feeding the meter and other delightful and simple methods all contribute to the child’s well being and makes the parent/ child relationship richer and a stronger bond, for life.

Fabulous Parenting Advice
April 25, 2004 By Miriam Bookey (Santa Monica, CA USA)
This DVD is not only informative, it’s entertaining as well. The message (using “toddlerese” to connect with your child) was consistently relayed, cohesive and universally appealing. We watched real parents dealing with VERY real kids in the kinds of situations we all experience (fighting over toys, going to bed, etc etc). Frankly, I think this DVD should be packaged with Dr. Karp’s book “Happiest Toddler on the Block,” as it’s imperative to watch and know exactly how to use the method (and to do it without feeling as if you’re “teasing” or speaking down to your child). My husband and I have both watched it and are following Dr. Karp’s method. Are we happy? You bet. Our 2-year-old’s tantrums have gone down at least 75% (both frequency and duration).

Wow! This worked better than I expected
January 31, 2005 By C. Kimura “black and yellow fan” (Honolulu, HI)
I was very skeptical when I learned about this DVD. I didn’t think that something could help eliminate 90% of the tantrums that we had with our 2 year old. To my amazement, after my wife viewed the DVD while I was at work. I came home and watched her use it on my son, and it worked. We’ve watched the DVD together since then and have worked on using the techniques to suit our needs. I don’t typically rate products, but I felt compelled to help others who have struggled finding a solution with their toddlers too.

Perfect for busy moms!
April 21, 2004 By Debbie Farmer,author: Don’tPutLipstickontheCat!
I think this video is perfect for busy moms who don’t have time read the book. The information is clear and it presents all of the crucial information found in the book. I give it five stars! Debbie Farmer, parenting author of ‘Don’t Put Lipstick on the Cat’

Very Interesting
March 10, 2010 By E. Cash “CBA” (NJ)
This book as a very interesting perspective and I think it is very good. THe tape defiantly helped whith understanding how to follow through with the books ideas.

Great Parentig tips & tools
June 3, 2010 By Lisa (CA, USA)
The Happiest Toddler on the Block: How to Eliminate Tantrums and Raise a Patient, Respectful, and Cooperative One- to Four-Year-Old: Revised Edition (Paperback) I have only had time to read about halfway through the book (I have a toddler remember) but when my 1-1/2 year old starting acting up I found this book to be a great help. If you open yourself up to the tools and tricks mentioned you’ll find the Terrible Twos to be much more manageable. My son is now 2-1/2 and I can’t even remember the last time he threw a tantrum. The book teaches you to understand and respect your toddler – yes, RESPECT! He just seems happier and much more content now and following the book’s rules have become second nature to us.

Happiest Toddler on the Block (Karp)
20 July 2011, by community.babycenter.com
When I was 18 and had a summer job at the shoestore, where I decided I definitely never wanted to have children. I just felt awful for the parents, pleading and begging with their kids and after all the pain they had to write us a check for shoes that were going to be outgrown in a month anyway. Every week I heard parents say the same thing… “Bradley now you behave yourself so we can try these shoes on you if you do not settle down and hold still we’re leaving here and you’re not getting any shoes!” and it’d do nothing, probably because darling Bradley probably didn’t want shoes in the first place. He was there to shred the tissue paper.

Well I broke my promise and reproduced anyway. So when I noticed Josie starting to pull random crazy toddler drama, like laying on the floor screaming when I wouldn’t let her put her carry a full glass of ice water around, I decided maybe I needed a plan B that was better than the shoe store parents.

I picked up the exciting sequel to “The Happiest Baby on the Block”: “The Happiest Toddler on the Block” by Harvey Karp.

This book is full of tips to make life with a crazy toddler easier. The main gist is that toddlers have very simple brains. When we’re all happy, we instinctively use simple language they understand… “Yay fun you went down the slide!” But when they make us mad, we tend to flip into authoritarian adult mode. “Now Betsy, Jon wants to play with the ball so you have to let him have his turn. Remember last week we talked about sharing? I don’t want to have to tell you again that you can’t always have whatever toy you want.”

The issue is that now instead of just having no ball to play with, Betsy also has to deal with this adult who clearly does not understand her situation. With her little brain overloaded with emotion, there’s no way complicated sentences or logical arguments are going to sink in. She doesn’t know what you’re saying, doesn’t think you know what she’s saying, it’s an express train to tantrum-ville.

So Dr. Karp recommends changing up our reactions. First, acknowledge your toddler’s feelings so they feel like you “get it” and relate to them. “Betsy is mad mad mad! She really wanted that ball!” And you keep repeating that idea until you get through. He calls it the “fast food rule”, because it’s sort of like when the burger king cashier repeats your order back to you so you feel all warm and fuzzy.

When you feel like you’ve got her attention and there’s hope in sight, then you can move on to your side of the situation… “But NO ball. John’s ball. We can have fun with these blocks!”

My daughter is barely one so I hadn’t really been explaining things to her in complex language anyway, but I have tried some of the techniques in the books because I know she understands more language than she lets on. I think it makes her happier just because it forces me to be focused and come across like I have a really good idea for whatever drama is going on, instead of just being angry. I’ve actually gotten her to smile a few times in the middle of the tears, just by “sportscasting” her actions like the book says, sometimes laying on the floor with her as she’s picking a place to throw down.

The good news is that Dr. Karp says the “terrible twos” tend to curve off at the actual age of two… the most terrible age is really 18-24 months. Then at the three year mark things get weird again… kids are caught between wanting to act like babies and wanting to do everything for themselves.

But although the book is about difficult topics, you can tell it’s written by someone who loves toddlers. He conveys how exciting this age is, how fast things change, and how much love these little cave-people have to give us. We are ambassadors between worlds, he says, creating new members of civilization. Learn their language, put your foot down when something’s unacceptable, admire how cute it all is.

AF_mom99 on BabyCenter
Posted 9/1/11

We use it and our child haw few tantrums and has never had a meltdown. We also follow 1-2-3 Magic now that he is approaching 2 yrs old. But behaviors are divided in 3 categories: good (green light) behavior, annoying (yellow light) behavior, and unacceptable (red light) behavior.

The video instructs you on how to deal with these behaviors with various methods but the biggest one that works for us is accepting that our toddler like a caveman. His brain is not equipped for adult logic. So you have to treat him like a caveman. Sounds simple but many parents use sentences that are too long or try to reason with toddlers when it’s not fair — they have caveman brains.

We use the Fast Food Rule to communicate — listen, repeat and repeat again — like you’re in a fast food lane. You mirror and articulate their emotions or desire because the toddler cant’ speak because he is a caveman.

Observe behavior: “You’re crying” “You’re mad”

Articulate emotions or desire: “Mommy hold me” “I’m sick” “I want it”

Repeat and repeat — and eventually your toddler will see that you understand him. Only use short sentences.

Our child also love “Paying the Boob” which sounds perverse but it’s acting silly and in an exaggerated way when communicating or interacting with a toddler so they feel empowered. Really works for encouraging green light behaviors. For example, when we put toys away I drop the toys and say “Oh no!” I try to put it in the basket and I miss. — “Mommy missed!” Then he runs up and he does it and I say” Wow!” So I am big clumsy fool and only my big boy toddler can save the day. You would be amazed at how many green light behaviors you can “Play The Boob” — like eating — I pretend to miss his mouth or I drop the food. Then he picks it up or uses his spoon — “Yay!” or throwing garbage away — I pretend I can’t find the garbage can “Where is the garbage? Where did it go?” and he “finds it.” Seems simple but lots of parents do the opposite — like speaking to a toddler like an adult or doing too much for them instead of letting them be empowered to do things themselves.